I pondered the idea of writing "You are Destined for Greatness" and taping it to my bathroom mirror. It sounds like an incredibly cheesy idea straight out of a self-help book, but I thought it was worth trying. Upon further relfection of this idea, I realized it would fail. Not because I would laugh at that statement daily, but rather, I take 100 degree showers. So the ink would run and the paper would crinkle. Plus, I need the whole mirror to examine myself in the morning anyway.
What is greatness? Is it the attribute of world leaders and life changers, or is it a quality in which we can all possess? Is greatness a thing we strive for? Does the prospect of greatness motivate us?
I think it may motivate me. In high school, countless people told me "Mary Anna, you are going places." "Mary Anna, you're going to do big things." "Mary Anna, you're going to be somebody big someday." I'm trying to capture some of that high school MAness I had. Back in the day, I wasn't scared of anything. I felt I had nothing to lose. I wore confidence like a Coach purse and felt...powerful. Maybe it was all the potential people bestowed upon me. Maybe it was because I was president of my class for three years, prom queen, homecoming queen, president of the FLBA, vice president of the PTSA, and played God in the school play. Maybe because I got into one of the most prestigious schools in the state, or because I had a closeknit group of friends always at my side.
I remember walking the halls of my high school, when this freshman girl bumped into me. She said, "What do you say?" I looked at her, trying not to laugh at her rudeness when her friend whispered to her, "Don't you know who that is?. That's Mary Anna Rodabaugh!" Of course, the scrappy freshman said, "I don't give an *bleep* who she is..she needs to say excuse me." I was already past her and down the hall, laughing to myself that her friend had a sense of awe in her voice.
I know this sounds like a horribly concieted memory and you might be rolling your eyes at my bragging but it is important to note these things. When I arrived at William and Mary, I carried my confidence around with me until about 12 hours into my freshman orientation. It took 12 hours to knock down a spirit of fearlessness that had been built within me for 18 years.
I trapsed through college, enjoying various nitches. I felt accepted by my sorority, reveared by the radio station, and respected by my workplace. However I couldn't help but think I reached my peak in high school. With a life full of potential infront of me, how could I possibly think that high school was the high top to my mountain?
Looking back I still want to believe that I am destined for greatness. I guess I've done "big things" by solidfying myself in the Youth Advocate position at my work. After all, there was no position until I started volunteering and some may say that I made myself a bit indispensible. I try to help people everyday, isn't that greatness?
It is, to some extent. But I feel I am destined for more. The world is going to know who I am. I'm on the brink of making some exciting life changes which I will share with you later. However, I find myself following my passions and designing my path to greatness. It will happen. I took the confident and fearless high school spirit and coupled it with the mature and slightly cautious and responsible adult I am today. Coupling these two extreams and balancing them into one person...I can only become great, I can only change lives each day through my compassion, my love, and my passions.
Until next time...