Thursday, March 3, 2011

Relaxation Fail

So last night, after a particularly not so great day, I decided I was going to take a nice hot bath. I really wanted the relaxation experience so I lit candles, put on classical music and poured myself a glass of wine. Now, I have never taken a bath in my bathtub in the apartment but it looked a lot larger than most bathtubs I have been in. So I figured I'd fit nicely in it and maybe have to bend my knees for ideal soaking comfort.

The problem is, I don't have a plug for my drain. I decided to use a coffee cup because it turned out to be the perfect size to cover the drain hole. I began to fill the tub and put a whole bunch of bath salts, bubble bath mix and even one of those gel bath balls. The tub filled up with hot steamy and bubbly water.

I stopped the water after the tub was a little over half full. I figured my body would cause the water levels to increase significantly. So I turned the lights off, put the candles on the ledge of the the tub, and stepped in.

The heat from the water felt awesome on my feet. As I submerged myself into the tub I realized I could use some more water. I turned on the faucet and alas, nothing but cold water came out. I had used up all the hot water! Giving up on that, I tried to lay back in the tub, bending my knees so the water would cover my stomach and chest. Well, this failed for obvious obesity reasons.

While lying in this awkward position I heard the faint sound of water draining. It was then when I realized that my coffee mug was not sufficently blocking the water drain. So I ended up sitting in the tub with water barely covering my legs until there was no water. I then got up and took a cold shower since I had used all the hot water.

After my cold shower, I blew out my relaxation candles, chugged my glass of wine, proceeded to watch my fish swim around for a half hour, and then decided it would be a great idea to read the cards from the Cranium game. I tested myself to see if I knew all the Humdinger songs. Then I pulled down my high school journal.

While reading my high school journal I was embarassed. One, because the writing is AWFUL. It screams hormonal teenager who can't write for crap. (I've improved in my writing so much by now) Two, because I did some really stupid and embarassing crap in high school that unfortunatly I still do today. I found a quote that I think I came up with on my own. It read:

"Don't make someone your world only to become their option."

Wow. If I wrote that, that is the most profound thing I have ever said! Words to live by.

So tonight I'm not going to try any cool relaxation technique. I'm going to get off work late, go home, watch Grey's Anatomy and go to bed early. I can relax in my sleep.

Until next time...

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