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Today is one of those days where I find myself awake and alert but also swimming in a sea of emotions. This morning on my drive in to work, I had a few moments to declutter my head and heart and really think about things. I contemplated my losses, where I'm at in life now, what I want to do. I realized that these feelings were free to bubble to the surface because for the first time in awhile, my mind was calm. I keep myself very busy. My work days are 8.5 hours long. My commute takes 2 hours out of my day. Two weeknights I kickbox so I get home with just enough time to get a shower and get to bed. My weekends are full of errands, chores and usually at least one nap to recharge. 

"You never sit down. You're always doing something," a friend of mine said over the phone last week. She was referring to my Facebook and my constant string of activities. I thought about that for a moment and realized she is right. Most of my time is accounted for. 

So when you've got an hour drive ahead of you and a CD with some emotional songs, all those things you push down have a chance to resurface. I keep myself busy because I don't want to think about things. You really don't realize how much shit you've been through until it all comes back at once. Then you're like "I have a pretty good life but damn I've been through some shit."

Anyway, that is my deep thought for the day. Life is fine. I'm coasting through the year. My fitness goals have been up and down. I entered the lottery for the Broad Street Run and I'm hoping I get in. If so, it is serious training time. My main goal for 2016 besides making it the year of health is to run the Broad Street Run in under 2 hours. Kickboxing has been going well and I've found I work better with certain instructors. I love everyone there, they are all amazing but some nights I do a lot better when I have certain teachers. 

Running....well...I ran pretty well last week. Speed sucks but endurance is getting better. Yoga...I got to get back on that train too. Last night I tried a new video and I had a hard time concentrating. The instructor was good and I think the flow was right, but I got super ADD about it and wanted to do a million other things besides the yoga so I had to stop halfway. Woops. 

Work is fine. Still crazy since we're in a whirlwind of transition. I'm getting more responsibility and tasks to do so that is good. 

Bronx celebrated his 3rd birthday on Sunday. I made him a peanut butter carrot cake. He was quite the happy boy, especially when we went to the Pretzel Factory for some birthday pretzels. 

His adoption anniversary is next weekend (after Valentine's weekend). I'm hoping the weather holds out. I'd like to take him back to his shelter for an alumni visit and drop off a few donations in honor of our year together. I think that would be the best way to celebrate his Gotcha day. 

He continues to be a phenomenal dog. He makes me laugh daily. Last night he ran into the bedroom, jumped on the bed, shoved his nose into my neck and burrowed his head under my covers. Snuggle pups with a cold nose. I was laughing and then tucked his blanked around him and fell asleep with his head on my arm. Love him. 

I guess that is about it. Nothing new to report. Maybe I won't be so nostalgic next post.

Until next time....


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