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Static

March went by in a blur. An epic blur. I'm beginning to see how my life is like a cyclical calendar. I mean, all of our lives are like cyclical calendars but there are various routine events that happen each and every year at the same exact time. 

For example, last Friday I attended my 6th annual DVAEYC conference. It was fun because I also wrote about it for Generocity. Plus I got up and close photos of PA Governor Tom Wolf so there's that. The following day I had my 6th Stairway to Our Future, a large fundraising gala that raises money for my work. It is routine events like this that make me go "oh, it's that time of year again" in my head. In fact, last year's March post was also entitled March Madness. See? Routine. The Same. Cyclical. Predictable. 

Lately I've been trying to really accept this notion:
"Stability is important, but not at the sacrifice of happiness. Take a risk and pursue what's really important to you."

I know a few people who actually did that. They quit stable, high paying, secure jobs and began doing what they wanted to do with their life. They seem happy, even in the chaos of living paycheck to paycheck. I'm beginning to think that maybe that life is for me too. 

My time at my current job has taught me many things. If it wasn't for Drueding, I wouldn't have been able to afford my center city apartment or gone to graduate school. I wouldn't have made lasting friendships (even though many of those friends quit and moved away we still talk). I wouldn't have had the opportunity to comfortably freelance for other media outlets. 

I think I've maximized my growth here. There is no room for promotion other than personal promotion by serving on committees, which I already do (many of them). I could brainstorm new projects but that just adds work to my plate not development to my professional growth. Sure I can afford food for me and my dog and I have really good health insurance but at the end of the day I don't feel quite as fulfilled as I once did. I get more joy out of writing, or interviewing, or seeing my work published than I do after a long day of social work, even if a client told me I made a difference in their life. 

So I guess the point is, I'm at a static phase. I'm trying to make moves to "take a risk and pursue what's really important to you," As always that risk taking comes with an epic waiting game. A game I've been losing quite a bit at lately. But I'm not giving up. 

Until next time... 

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