Dear Philadelphia, I love you.

Today I found out that my favorite late night drunk pizza place is reopening its doors after the shop was heavily damaged by a fire last summer. Lorenzo's Pizza is back! It makes me want to go to South Street tonight, drink too much PBR at the Tattooed Moms and then buy a $2.75 slice of cheese pizza the size of my head.

While telling a co-worker about this incredibly happy news, she laughed, shook her head and said "You were supposed to end up in Philly. You are always having a ball!"

I love it when people say that. Believe it or not, I get it a lot.

I've written posts about being that little girl in the backseat of the car staring up at the big skyline on I-95 while equally big dreams swim through my head. I always thought I'd end up in New York City or Chicago or even Miami. I never EVER thought I would end up in Philadelphia. I thought the actual city looked dirty and scary as a child.

But I ended up here and I love it. I've complained about my job, my school, my neighbors, my apartment, but never ever have I complained about this city. Sure it is dirty, people are rude, the homeless people on the street who harass me make me want to fight them, people can not drive for crap, and sweatpants are a fashion staple. But I love it.

People joke with me when I say I'm going to go where the job is. If I find a job outside of Philly, I'm going to take it. They laugh, shake their head and say "no, Mary Anna. You're going to end up staying in Philly. You'll live in South Philly and when you're ready to start a family you'll move to the Northeast. You'll join a PTA, your kids will go to karate and you won't leave the city."

I laugh and dismiss this but they could be right. With each year I spend as a Philadelphia resident, I feel more and more like I belong here. I feel like less of a transplant and more of a native. I embrace river concerts and just fishing off the Schuylkill banks river trail. I love watching Rocky on the Art Museum steps during the 4th of July week. I love the cheese steak competition. I appreciate the wonders of brunch. I love walking into my favorite bar and the staff knows me....even in a big bad city. I like the history and learning about it.

I still look up at the big skyline and I still have equally big dreams but I wouldn't be surprised if they are fulfilled in Philly.

Until next time...

It Was Time For A Face Lift

I started this blog in the summer of 2009. I had just graduated The College of William and Mary and had no effin clue what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. I have a blast looking back at the old posts and seeing how much I've changed.

While the blog entries have decreased in number each year, I have...indeed...maintained this blog for almost 4 years. This is a huge accomplishment since I rarely finish or keep up with anything I start. So to honor that accomplishment, I did a little redecorating. I hope you like it.

Lately I have been feeling on top of my game despite the fact I have a paper due today at 5:30 and I am by no means done and it is 11:25am. haha But, I've made some personal discoveries that I believe will lead to fruitful change in my life. I'm trying to learn how to keep calm and carry on in the midst of chaos. I'm also enjoying this beautiful spring weather and have been swagging out my spring outfits all week. Looking good makes you feel good.

April is/has been/will continue to be a big month for me. I'm doing some traveling in two weeks down to William and Mary for the reunion aka farewell of my college sorority chapter, Phi Mu Gamma Alpha. The last weekend of April, I'm going to my best friend's cousin's wedding...where the only person I'll know is my best friend.I have to say I'm pretty excited. I'm still waiting to hear back about my "take a chance" news. I can't disclose right now because I might jinx it. If things work out there will be a huge post about it. There is a good chance this news could hit in April.

I can't explain it. I just feel awake, aware, alive. I also feel like I'm changing again, but it isn't dramatic and it is most certainly for the good.

Until next time...

Reverse Your Own Psychology

Forgive me for the vague and potentially rambling nature of this post. It is important, though.

When you're struggling with a math problem and you just can't figure out the answer, sometimes you have to take a break and tackle it after clearing your mind for a bit. Sometimes when you're writing a paper or a story, you get writer's block and you have to get up, walk around, run some errands, and come back to your assignment.

Relationships, friendships, human interactions are like that too. Sometimes we do stupid things that we think will help us reach insignificant goals. We use manipulative tactics, we talk around issues, we hint and nudge to get an outcome we think we deserve. The reality is, that never works and the other party(ies) catch on really quick.

The best thing you can do is realize the problem starts with you. You are the problem. There are a multitude of experiences in your life that have hard wired you to have certain problems but you can fix your current situation. How? You take a step back. You give up on your demands and just walk away for a minute, clear your head, see how you're feeling. You can not change, fix, manipulate or force another party to think, act, do what you want. But you can change, fix, manipulate and force yourself to alter your perspective and make a glaring need appear insignificant.

When you step back, back down, walk away for a second....something amazing happens. You think you're relinquishing control of the situation. You think you're giving up, but you are not. In fact, you are empowering yourself. You gain more control by stepping down than you do attacking your needs head on. (In most cases). Obviously if say, you thought you deserved a raise...backing down and walking away won't get you what you want. This tactic is primary effective in human relationships.

Sometimes doing the opposite of what seems logical, actually gets you the outcome you wanted all along. Who knew it was that easy?

Until next time....