Delayed Onset of the Quarter Life Crisis

It is Monday afternoon. I've had several people tell me how powerful and moving a recent feature article I wrote for my company's employee newsletter was. I wrote a posthumous piece on a beloved employee based off of the stories others told me of her. They painted the picture of who she really was and I took that picture, put it down in words and e-mailed it out to over 3,000 people. It did the job. 

Moments like that are affirming to me. Nothing is more satisfying than feeling like the thing you loved, the thing you studied, is the thing you're really really good at. You may know you are talented in that arena but it always feels good to be complimented for it. That validation is necessary to keep doing what you love and keep doing it well. 

Except when your whole job isn't about that one piece of the passion. 

Recently I finished the book "You Are Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Live an Awesome Life," by Jen Sincero. It was a self-help book that actually turned my thinking upside down. It made me question why I want the things that I want (or thought I wanted) and why I'm living the life that I am living. 

That is not to say my life sucks and I'm not being "bad ass." I sort of am. But the glaring message throughout the book to me was, "Mary Anna, you're not living your best life. You're not being true to yourself. You're not striving for the greatness you once believed you could achieve." Damn you Sincero. I was comfortable in my comfort zone of blah. I enjoyed working my tail off at a highly stressful yet mostly fulfilling job. I was going to buy a house so I could paint my walls the color I want them and adopt a second dog. 

I can't call it a quarter life crisis because I'm almost 30. So, it is a delayed onset of a quarter life crisis. I'm reevaluating everything in my life. Take healthcare as a career field for example. I literally tripped and landed into healthcare. I graduated from college, entered a volunteer program (in healthcare) got hired to maintain my volunteer position for pay (in healthcare) got promoted to the corporate side to use my journalism skills (in healthcare) and am now the PR person for a health system. Seven years of healthcare. 

Healthcare has been good to me. But is healthcare where I want to be? Sure healthcare is paying the bills. Healthcare is helping with student loans. Healthcare provides me with health insurance. But if I'm supposed to be living my truth and following my passion, I'm questioning if that passion is indeed, healthcare.

I know my passion lies in writing and storytelling. Basically I love creating things, writing, telling stories and making people laugh. Those are the fundamental cornerstones to "my passion." I get to do a bunch of those things in my current circumstances, but not all of them. I don't feel the level of fulfilled-ness that Sincero is telling me I can feel. But who is she to judge my life? Homegirl made millions of dollars off a book (now two) and gets paid to travel around the world and life coach and give motivational speeches. 

The point is, that stupid book make me question everything and I don't like it. That stupid book made me question why I even want to buy a house right now. That stupid book made me question why I haven't done a stand-up comedy open mic night yet. That stupid book made me question why I haven't written a stupid book yet. I know, all of these big dreams sound selfish and my desire to marry my joys and passions make me sound like a naive millennial snowflake who thinks the world owes me pleasure. Believe me, that is not what I think at all. However, I do believe that when my teachers and mentors told me I could be anything I want to be, I believed them and I still do today. There IS value to the power of positive thinking There IS value to looking yourself in the mirror, asking yourself what you want to be doing for the rest of your life and DOING THAT. 

People will say "oh you don't have the resources to make that dream a reality" or "you should really be thankful you even have a job in this economy, try to find your joy in your current situation instead of finding a whole new situation." But I can't believe that. I refuse to believe I was put on this earth to work my ass off, pay bills and die. 

Now I'm reading "52 ways to live a kick-ass life." Lord help me. But I'm also planning and getting strategic about my future. I'm working out the ways I can live my best life, be fulfilled AND pay the bills/feed my dog. I'm dreamscaping my life and it feels damn good. My biggest worry is that I, a textbook Meyers-Briggs ENFP, am just excited by the "thought" of change and the planning process but won't go through with it. Yet every day I find a new real-time, real-world reminder as to why I HAVE to do this, so maybe this time it is for real. 

Until next time....

I don't crack glass ceilings, I shatter glass doors

Hot off the heals of an amazing Memorial Day weekend, I enter the work week with a renewed sense of purpose and determination. I did everything I wanted to do that weekend. I cleaned my apartment, bathed my dog, went hiking with my best friend, hung out with Bronx at a pop-up beer garden, got my hair done, met my new dog walker, gave my neighbor a fond farewell, spent time with special people and went to an epic concert that literally set my soul on fire. 

I've been reading Jen Sincero's book "You are badass, how to stop doubting your greatness and live an awesome life." The book has turned my world upside down. I thought things were going moderately well for me. I have a great job and my roof no longer leaks at my apartment. All that good stuff. However, upon reading this book it became alarmingly clear that I am not living my best life. There is a bucket list of things I want to do and an equally longer list of reasons why I choose not to do them. Excuses. I'm becoming aware that I'm living a life that involves working extremely hard, paying bills and getting closer each day to death. As dramatic as that sounds, it is true. 

In an effort to reclaim my passions, I spent Monday night watching Hulu, whitening my teeth and dream mapping my life. I put circle squares down and wrote down the things I want to achieve: buy a home, larger social circle, more adventures, traveling makes me very happy...etc and then little circles with steps to get there. I did this about five years ago and said my three main goals were to move to South Philly, buy a Kia Soul and adopt a Boxer dog. I did those things. Time to do bigger things again. 

I went to bed Monday night with a clearer head and a renewed sense of purpose, as I mentioned before. I had some ideas, a little bit of hope and excitement about the future and a miraculously clean home. When I got into work the next day with my freshly done hair and whiter teeth, I felt optimistic. 

That was until later in the afternoon. I wrapped up a highly successful meeting and went to exit my meeting space. I slide the glass door open to exit and the next thing I know, I'm standing in a pile of glass, holding the door handle, not moving. The door shattered completely. It basically exploded. 

I am not sure why, or how, but I was calm. I stood there and yelled for someone to call maintenance and did not move a muscle. Glass was everywhere and I could already see my arm starting to bleed. I picked a helluva a day to wear a white skirt, but at least I also wore combat boots so my feet were protected. Thankfully the person I was meeting with was not hurt. 

Two seconds after the thunderous crash, half my building was standing in front of me, directing me what to do. After handing over the door handle and removing a plastic liner covered in glass from my arm, I could exit the glass mountain to safety. A co-worker rushed me to the ER where I was cleaned up and bandaged and sent on my way. 

I wanted to start the work week off with a bang. This was not the bang I intended. I didn't crack a glass ceiling but I shattered a glass door. My incident promoted a safety inspection of all of the remaining glass doors in the building. Hopefully my mishap prevents it from happening to someone else. 

Now I just smile and nod at the "bubble wrap" jokes and the "padded room" comments. (I walked into a glass window last winter while chasing an Amazon package and fractured my nose). However one thing is apparent, I have a crap ton of people who care about me and my well being, so that is always a nice feeling to have. Additionally I had time to reflect on all of the "near misses" I've had in my life. I've been in three car accidents, two involved totaled cars, and I walked away from all of them, pretty much uninjured sans some airbag burns on my arms. I've been to the ER about 5 times in my life, once for stitches for a cut under my eye that was dangerously close to my eye. I have a guardian angel, that is for sure. 

The rest of the week has been much less eventful. A highlight is I found a Trader Joe's near my work so when I'm in dire need of TJ eats I can swing by on my way home. This weekend I've got some laundry on deck and some side projects. Then I'll get back to reclaiming my passions and finding ways to make that dream map a reality. 

Until next time...

The Only Race I Care About

I wrote a blog post for March complaining about how brutal March was. I had a lot of things due, a lot of things happening, a lot of things that needed to be completed. I never completed that post, though. I guess I didn't feel like wasting precious blog space on complaining. I wrote a post about May but didn't finish that one either. Not sure why, perhaps I got distracted. 

Well, we're going to finish this post. 

Hi friends. It has been awhile. Clearly I have yet to be spit out of this never ending whirlwind called my life. May has been okay so far. The biggest news to report was my 2017 appearance in the Independence Blue Cross Broad Street Run. For the third year in a row, I set out to PR this 10 miler. I wrote the time to beat on my hand: 2:26:53. I did everything right: trained, geared correctly, fueled correctly and ran more than I had in previous years. I usually end up walking miles 5-10 but this year I was still running off and on in miles 7, 8 and 9. Let's start from the beginning...

For the 3rd year in a row I actually got a seat on the subway. I bet my luck runs out next year. Upon arrive to Broad and Olney, I was greeted by a very festive SEPTA station. They went all out with balloons and a photobooth this year. SEPTA is a corporate sponsor of the race and they really enjoyed their role in this year. I was so early. I had plenty of time to pee, stretch, eat, stretch and pee again. Most notably, the second port-a-potty trip where I was in line for a good 40 minutes. Some other runners told us there were no lines at the pottys further down this hill by the track but a bunch of us stubbornly stayed in line. "I've invested too much time in this line," the guy behind me said. "This line is meaningful to me," I said, my voice mock quivering. It was hilarious. Some good souls passed back a nice roll of toilet paper as well, saving us from the unsightly horrors that lie in the pre-race potty hell. 

I lined up in my corral, took my inhaler, cued up my playlist and got ready to run. As our wave took off (the last wave), I got a little emotional. I didn't cry but I almost did. Everything I did leading up to that point was for this race. 40,000 people got up at the butt crack of dawn, payed $50+ to run 10 miles through Philadelphia with friends and strangers. As I crossed the start, a wave of spectators were lined up to my right. I ran over and high fived about 25 people in a row. They pumped me up and I think I pumped them up. I couldn't stop smiling. 

Somewhere in mile 2, I popped my headphone out. I listened to what was around me. There were no spectators on that little stretch, no bands or entertainment...just runners. What I heard was the pounding of feet on the pavement...thousands of feet, pounding away. It was such a cool moment that I will never forget.

My goal other than to PR was to really enjoy the race...to be in it. To recognize the privilege it is to participate in such an event. I stopped to look at the neighbors on their porches, waving to us with smiles on their faces. I pulled out my headphones to listen to the entertainment that played and cheered for us as we ran past. I looked around at the shirts around me, I slowed down to high five little kids, I enjoyed every step and every mile.

I wouldn't have done anything differently. In mile 7.5, a huge wind and rain storm kicked up, throwing all of us still on the course to the land of PTSD of last year's race. I outstretched my arms and yelled a battle cry, promoting the volunteers around me to cheer. 

As I reached the finish, I checked my phone and saw my best friend was waiting for me. I've never had someone wait for me at the finish before. It meant to the world to me seeing him, his cousin and her husband (who finished an hour before me) wait for me to pass by. Some girl, there are a ton of pics of her, was screaming at me YOU GOT THIS GET IT DONE. I appreciated her. I ran across the finish, assuming I didn't PR. As I got inline to enter the finisher's area, I checked my phone. I had my race alerts sent to me via text. I looked at my finish time.

2:26:53. I didn't PR. I matched my 2015 time TO THE SECOND. Exact same time. It was written on my hand. Like some sort of magic trick. I was thrilled. The only thing better than getting a PR was doing this once and a lifetime thing. I knew I gave it my all. I knew I ran for long stretches of time, more than ever before. I couldn't and wouldn't change a thing. 

Third time was not a charm, but it was very special. I honestly can not wait to do this again next year. 

Until next time...

The Flu is Not Your Friend

Ok, let's face it. The flu is no one's friend. I got it for the first time in as long as I can remember. Last Sunday (not yesterday but the week before) I went on a nice long hike with Bronx and my bff. We did about 5 miles PLUS I got a one mile trail run in to keep the #RunStreakPhl alive. All was well until Monday morning when I had a few body aches, which turned into A LOT of body aches and a fever and some chills on top. I felt awful. I left around 2:30pm and headed home. I barely got Bronx out and back in before I collapsed in my bed, pulling the covers tightly around me despite it being 65 degrees outside. 

For the next week I battled the icky sickies. I took off Tuesday but had to work from home 12:30-6pm to get something done. I went in for a half day on Wednesday but was miserable. I got things done and met my deadlines but I felt like total crap. It was such a waste. Thursday I took off again and stayed off. Friday I returned for a full work day but I was still coughing and feeling sort of out of it. 

Saturday I had to work but I felt a lot better. I even made it out for a run! But I did too much too fast and by Saturday evening I was coughing again every spare second. So Sunday I was down for the count. 

I will say in all of this, I've still managed to keep the running streak alive. They let you do the elliptical or walk, so I've been doing a lot of walking to keep it going. I feel like I ran half the month and walked half the month. Yesterday I walked because I was coughing every five seconds and it was cold and windy. I think tonight I might try a run again after errands when I get home. Tomorrow is the last day of the streak. Another 30 days of healthy habits in the books.

For March I'm doing the Plank Challenge. Each day I'll be doing a plank, uping the duration each week. So Week 1 - one 15 second plank each day; Week 2 - one 30 second plank each day; Week 3 - one 45 second plank each day and Week 4 - one 60 second plank each day. I should have abs by April. This also includes increasing my water intake, my vegetable intake and continuing to run and kickbox. I've lost close to 30 pounds since January 1st, well on my goal of losing 10 pounds a month. I want to keep crushing it. 

So for now, I'm just easing back into my routine, hoping I don't get sick for quite some time. That was no joke. It was especially hard when the weather was amazing outside and I couldn't go play in it. No runs. No hikes. Just brief walks with Bronx before rest again since it tired me out. Blegh. So over it and so glad I'm finally on the mend. I thought I would be sick forever!

Until next time...

Successful #Whole30 and February's Challenge

Done. Done. Done. Done. Done. On February 7th, I completed my last day of the #Whole30 Challenge. All in all, I lost 20 pounds since Jan 3rd, 15 of which were during the challenge. I learned how to cook new foods and broke up with sugar (though we reunited recently with the hopes of breaking back up again). I learned how to eat when I'm hungry not just when I'm stressed or bored. I'm really glad I did the challenge even though parts of it were tough. 

For February, I've entered the #RunStreakPhl challenge...run a mile every day in February. I mean, we only have 28 days, right? At first, I was on FIRE. I would look forward to my runs and I was so excited to see my progress run after run. I could run longer, faster and easier with each day. Until a few days ago...when days of running turned into a bad case of shin splints. Now running is extremely painful. I'm trying to stick with the challenge, rolling my shins/calves and stretching more, wearing compression sleeves and socks, and taking it a little bit slower. I'm determined to finish, I just want to get back to where I was enjoying the stress relief of the run and not the painful stabbing in my legs. 

Halfway there. 

I registered for the Hot Chocolate 15K in April. It is a month before the Broad Street Run (I find out if I made the lottery for that one tomorrow morning) so I figured 9 miles is a good benchmark to see how I'll fare with 10 miles in May. 

Work is busy and at times hectic but I'm making through my days and learning a lot in my new role. I'm currently the Corporate Communications Manager, a promotion I received on Christmas Day. Navigating the Public Relations landscape has been an adventure but turns out it is not that far off from reverse journalism, so the skill set is there. 

Life? Um. It is ok. I've been keeping busy with the challenges I'm doing each month and trying to continue to lose weight so I can skydive for my 30th in August. Been trying to be more social. Not that I'm anti-social, but sometimes a work week exhausts me to the point where I just want to be a hermit in jammies watching Netflix with Bronx. 

Bronx celebrated his 4th birthday last week! 

Little nugget enjoyed a trip to Pet Smart where he picked out (with help from Mom) that flat squirrel toy. He had a birthday cookie and also kindly posed for a few 4th birthday photos in his birthday hat (which he hated and promptly pawed off of his head). His goes to his new vet for his annual checkup this Saturday and then on Feb 21st, we'll celebrate our TWO YEAR adoption anniversary. This little (big) pup has brought so much joy to my life. He is the perfect dog for me and we love going on adventures together. Just this past weekend he came to Valley Forge with me for a nice 5 mile hike. 

That is about it. Here's to hoping I can run pain free soon. It was good stress relief for awhile there. 

Until next time...

#Whole30 Day 24

I can almost taste the cream in my coffee. I'm on Day 24 of #Whole30. I realized I have been going through the timeline a little more delayed than most people. At this point I should experience "Tiger Blood" which is endless energy and a positive outlook on life. While I do feel a small additional pep in my step, what I am going through now is the really insane dreams that involve me eating non Whole30 foods and feeling guilty. Like...oh hey, I'm almost done anyway...I'm going to eat this ice cream. 

In real life, I have no desire to destroy all of my hard work and partake in non Whole30 foods before my challenge is up. They say these dreams are your brain's way of trying to bring you back to your old eating habits and the food you used to gorge on has a psychological hold on you. Creepy right?

In other news, I've officially lost 15 pounds since this all started AND have entered a new challenge for February. I'm in the #RunStreakPhiladelphia challenge and must run at least one mile per day EVERY day in February. I'm hoping I can really stick to it, even if it means banging out a mile around my block 8 times or something. I think I'm going to do a challenge every month or something to keep me on track with my goals. 

I bought digestive enzymes which have been a BLESSING. Now I'm no longer have bathroom issues with the Whole30 diet and should have bought the enzymes on day one. Just one capsule before I eat and everything is fine. No more bloating. Whew. 

SIX days to go and then I'm done. Still considering eating a pint of Halo Top for breakfast on day 31 to celebrate. haha

Until next time...

#Whole30 Day 18

I'm over it. Yesterday I sat in a meeting where the most delicious pizza was served. I know this because I usually partake in the delicious pizza. Yesterday, I did not. Instead I took a heaping of tossed salad but there were no more forks left. So I ate the lettuce.......with my hands. 

I miss dairy. I'm over black coffee, black tea and even sparkling water is getting old. I miss cheese. I miss feeling full without feeling bloated. I miss normal bathroom trips. I miss not having to be aware of everything I put in my mouth all the time. Did I mention, I miss pizza? 

It is Day 18 of #Whole30. I'm not quitting but I'm being tested. Last night was particularly stressful as my bedroom ceiling began to fall apart. Pieces of plaster and chips of paint were found scattered on my floor and bed. In a pinch I had to clean the mess up, sleep in my living room and arrange for Bronx to go to daycare today so my landlord can fix the damage. Not what I needed on an already stressful week. I felt my typical longing for wonton soup or comfort food OR WINE set it. These moments help me realize what triggers my disastrous food/drink cravings. The whole project is one epic learning experience. 

I'm over it but I'm not finished. I will see this damn thing through. After all, despite the discomfort and missing out on some really tasty but horrible for you treats....the program is working. 

Until next time...

Ohhh We're Halfway There...Ohhhh, Living on a Prayer!

DAY 15 of #Whole30. Halfway done. Whew! I'm down about 13 pounds. I haven't cheated. I even went out to my kickboxing studio's member's night at a BAR that I LOVE and I did not drink alcohol. Nope. The bartender hooked me up with an on-the-house club soda with lime and a splash of grapefruit juice to make it look like a cocktail. It was delicious and I was grateful.

Sunday night meal prep is now a ritual. I boil 9 eggs, cut up various produce all while cooking my Whole 30 dinner. This weekend was a great weekend for produce because Acme was having their bag a buck produce sale! I was able to get oranges, garlic, potatoes, steam veggies and more for only $1 each. My wallet was pretty pleased and I walked out with a TON of food. 

This morning we welcomed a new coworker with homemade scones and fruit. I didn't even blink at the scones and helped myself to a nice plate of fruit. Boo ya.

Doing this challenge has made me realized the food I DO miss. I miss dairy...like...putting cream or milk into my coffee in the morning. I miss cheese occasionally. I miss wine. I don't really miss sugar too much, or bread...though a slice of pizza would be pretty great right about now. 

15 down. 15 to go. 

Until next time...

#Whole30 Day 10

You are most likely to quit your #Whole30 program on days 10 and 11. The newness of it has worn off, the benefits aren't quite dramatic and you're tired.

Not me. I've lost about 10lbs. I'm learning new things to cook. I am tired though. I cook every night even if it is just a meal for the next day. Lots and lots of cooking. I did manage to eat out twice this week for lunch and remain 100% compliant! #salads

My favorite dish so far was this baked "linguine" dish made from bell peppers, zucchini and shrimp. I've also taken to baking apple slices and sprinkling some cinnamon on them (allowed). I am really tired though and my bowels...well...don't want to TMI but they've been at work. I'll just leave it at that. 

I refuse to quit. I refuse to give up. I refuse to cheat. 20 days to go!

Until next time...

7 Days Down...23 to Go #Whole30

I survived my first week of #Whole30 with only 3 minor cheats (all accidental). The first, I mentioned in a previous post was the Starbucks coconut milk that is not compliant. Didn't know, wasn't that much milk, everything is fine. The second cheat occurred when I went out to eat with my friend David. I got steak and eggs for dinner, a compliant meal with a side of sauteed mushrooms. The mushrooms are typically compliant except when they are sauteed in garlic and butter. Butter is a no no. So to my horror, my delicious mushrooms were drenched in butter. I literally blotted each mushroom on a napkin before eating it. 

The third and final cheat was a oversight cheat. I ordered a Cobb salad for lunch yesterday with my friend. I can eat all the things in the Cobb, granted I should have asked about where the bacon came from/how it was prepared and read the menu better. I said no to dressing which was fine but I failed to notice the delicious salad comes with crumbles of cheese! Not sure what kind, could be goat or blue...but I'm not allowed cheese. So I tried to separate my salad from the cheese bits as best as I could. 

I'm now hesitant to eat out again during #Whole30. It is just too hard to have a perfectly clean meal when you have no control of preparation. Additionally, I don't want to be that person who sends stuff back to the kitchen to accommodate my diet. I have a corporate lunch today an I've already identified what I'm eating and then I think its cold turkey for dining out for me. 

As far as intentional cheats go...I have none. I've stuck to the program faithfully. So far I've lost about 10lbs. I'm learning more about the different foods I can have and how to prepare them, trying to diversify my meals. Last night I had mini turkey burgers with avocado mash, tomato and asparagus. So good! Tonight I'm trying a linguine which is made from bell peppers, zucchini and shrimp. 

I'm also trying to think about how to maintain this lifestyle to a certain degree after Whole30. I don't want to just binge eat all the things I couldn't have before and gain all the weight back. I have to figure out a healthy balance that isn't so restricting (I'm gonna eat cheese) but isn't too far from the #whole30 guidelines because let's face it...this "diet" is totally working. I feel more focused, I have more energy and I am 100% committed to finishing strong. 

So that's the update for now. Everything else in life is fine. Got my oil changed and laundry done this weekend so that was great. 

Until next time...

#Whole30 Day 4 but really, a Day 3 recap

So far so good. Except for the accidental cheat I had yesterday. Yes, accidental. I read that Starbucks has coconut milk and Whole30 peeps were drinking that with their coffee. As you know, I'm allowed coconut milk. I thought for sure that the Starbucks kind was going to be okay. I was terrified to try the coconut milk so I thought let's ease in by putting it in coffee. Well, it was done. I drank it on my way to work and I got a taste of the tiniest little bit of SUGAR.

So I've only been doing this a few days, but when you eliminate sugar from your diet minus the kind that comes in fruit, you NOTICE when sugar is in things. It wasn't overpowering and it wasn't a lot, but it was there. When I got to work I looked it up and found out that Starbucks' coconut milk is NOT COMPLIANT. Therefore I cheated, accidentally. 

Not going to let that little speed bump derail the challenge. I did not know. Had I known and said "screw it, I'mma order this anyway.".....than yes, I would have restarted. However, lessons learned and whatnot.

Speaking of lessons, I learned I'm eating all the foods and do not have enough foods in storage. I ran out of fruit yesterday and was dangerously close to not having a lunch prepared for today. After kickboxing, I went over to Whole Foods and had a Come to Jesus moment in the store. I've been to Whole Foods many times. I know what they are all about. I avoid them because they are so damn expensive. Well, let me tell you, their produce was cheaper than Acme! Can you believe it? Not only that, but there were so many things in the store I could eat on Whole30! 

I am now obsessed with apple chicken sausages. When I got home I scrambled some eggs and sprinkled the delicious compliant chicken morsels on top. It was the first time since starting Whole30 that I felt really satisfied before going to bed. 

Now I have an arsenal of smoked salmon, cucumbers, chicken sausage, avocado, guac, celery, BANANA CHIPS and more. Om nom nom. I'm going to get through this. 

In other news I've lost almost 8lbs since January 3rd. Cardinal rule of Whole30 is not to weigh yourself during the challenge. I weigh myself twice a day and I'm happy with what I see. Even if I gained a little back, I wouldn't be upset. So I'm breaking that rule all over the place. 

However I am not straying from the rules of the diet. I have not tried to make paleo cupcakes or find a substitute to fries or chips. I'm only drinking water and La Croix and black coffee. I'm only in Day 4 but it already feels like a lifestyle. I have a corporate lunch on Monday and I picked a place that has food I can eat. I feel like I have honest to God dietary restrictions when I'm really just following a super strict elimination diet by my own choosing. Kind of funny. 

If I had a dollar every time I happily exclaimed, "I can eat that!"

It is just the beginning.

Until next time...

#Whole30 Day 2

I made it through my first day of #Whole30! Woo hoo! I did not cheat nor kill anyone. It was an interesting experience, though. 

First of all, I thought I was pretty prepared for this venture. I spent $91 in groceries and was ready to reap the Whole30 benefits. Then I didn't prep the night before my first day and had to resort to a massive salad for lunch. Needless to say, I was pretty hungry after lunch and as late afternoon went on. By the time I got home I had stomach cramps. Whole30 stresses that you eat when you're hungry, no deprivation. Well, I am going to have to pack way more food to feel full. 

By the end of the day, I was cranky. I was definitely craving some quick carbs. I made a surprisingly delicious spaghetti squash, chicken, tomato, onion casserole last night. It came out great and now I know how spaghetti squash works (it is kind of fun to prepare. I was amusing myself as I raked out the flesh and it looks like spaghetti). By the way, who on earth was the first person to think "mmm, let me cut this orange/yellow gourd in half and rake the flesh out and eat it?" In other news, my dog likes spaghetti squash. 

So by bedtime I was somewhat satisfied, still a little hunger and very irritable. I was tired and cranky. I'm guessing this is a byproduct of sugar withdraw. I'm told it only gets worse. I did however wake up rested and in a great mood, ready to start the day! For breakfast I had a grapefruit and two hard boiled eggs. For lunch I have my spaghetti squash casserole and fruit and baby carrots. Dinner will be a venison stir fry over riced cauliflower. I found some new recipes I'm excited to try for next week including smoke salmon fritatas and an avocado BLT egg salad recipe.  

I'm getting used to black coffee. Today when I ordered it the cashier at Dunkin was like, "Um, you may want to try that. It is black." At first I thought something was wrong with the coldbrew batch...then I realized he thought I made a mistake by ordering the super strong coffee black. No sir, I know what I'm doing. Not sure I'll drink my coffee/tea black forever but I can make it through the next 28 days with it this way.

I haven't mustered up the courage to try the coconut milk yet. I'm dreading it. I don't like coconut and that is one of the main things you can eat/use. Coconut oil, coconut milk, coconut flakes, coconut this, coconut that. Also sweet potatoes...that is another one that there are six million recipes for. I don't like sweet potatoes either. Sigh. 

Anyway, here's to sticking with the challenge. I think I can do this. Can't wait for the slump!

Until next time....

Whole30 Begins

Today is Day #1 of 30 for the Whole30 challenge. That's right folks...nothing but non-processed meats, vegetables and fruit for 30 days. No dairy, no grains, no alcohol. But all the eggs, baby carrots and cauliflower my heart desires. 

First let me be honest with you...this challenge is expensive. I dropped a whopping $90 on this week's meal plan ingredients at Acme. ACME! Not Whole Foods...but ACME! The cost of produce is pretty steep. I turned down avocados, cucumbers and peppers simply because I could not justify the price. However the spaghetti squash, coconut milk and La Croix waters put a hefty dent in the bill. I was glad to find peaches were on sale as were cantaloupe. 

This challenge involves a great amount of TIME...perhaps my most precious resource. I made the mistake of not properly planning out meal prep last night and was left in a pinch. I boiled some eggs and made a HUGE salad (which I know will be the most unfulfilling thing ever) for lunch today. Tonight I'm going to do things right and make a chicken, tomato, spaghetti squash casserole. That should last a few days a be a bit more hardy. 

I'm also on Day #1 of drinking black coffee. I'm drinking Dunkin's Coldbrew. It leaves something to be desired but I'll get used to it. There is no way I can nail this challenge without coffee. 

I also made a motivational advent calendar of sorts. For 30 days I have tear off post it notes that reveal a reason I'm doing this thing in the first place. My hope is that it helps keep me motivated to finish the challenge. 

My first temptation hit me the second I walked into work. Laying on the break room table were a few long stemmed chocolate dipped candies. It looked like strawberries or cake pops, I wasn't sure. I love cake pops! I gave them a passing glance and went on to cut up my breakfast grapefruit. This is going to be a long and bumpy ride but I'm determined to do it!

30 Days. I can do this. 29 more to go. 

Until next time...

On Track for the New Year

It is January 6 and I'm on track. I know, a whopping six days...woo. But I feel focused and I'm ready for 2017. As you can see, Bronx Brutus is ready for the snow! We got about two inches last night but at least the roads were clear this morning. 

I start Whole30 on Monday. Bye bye dairy, grains and alcohol for 30 days. I hope I can do it! I've lost 3lbs already since I started writing down what I eat and doing twice a day weigh-ins. I wanted a baseline for weight fluctuations but I'm learning my weight is actually staying the same in the morning and night (which is good). Last night I was shocked to see 3lbs gone already. Could be water weight, but I'll take it. Any subtraction is a positive. 

I made a triumphant return to kickboxing last night. It was a rough start but I eventually found my groove. I'm going to commit to going twice a week for now, building up to three times a week. I'm trying to make sure I'm not leaving Bronx every night. He's finally settling back into our old routine! It took awhile for him to adjust to being back in Philly but I think he's okay now. 

Here's to staying on track! I'll be sure to post about the Whole30 adventure starting next week. 

Until next time...

Sympathy for the Devil

In the final days of 2016, I was walking Bronx down the street and some neighborhood Mummers were testing their giant stereo system that was attached to a truck. The song, "Sympathy for the Devil" by the Rolling Stones was blasting at house-shaking volume. It was such a happy song. I've heard it many times before, but on that sunny day while walking my dog, it felt perfect. Now I can't stop listening to it. I'm listening to it right now. 

So it is 2017! Wow! I failed at blogging last year. With a measly what, seven posts? Sorry. If you read the recap, you saw it was a very busy year. I don't have as much downtime as I used to have. Work keeps me insanely busy and I cherish the few precious personal hours I get after work and spend them cooking dinner and hanging out with my dog. This year will be different...maybe. I'll write more. I promise. 

In other resolutions, I think I'm starting Whole30 on January 9. Why not this week? Well, I have some dairy I need to polish off before I start this thing. I'm not going to throw out perfectly good milk and fat free cottage cheese because I'm trying the Whole30 thing out. So I'll eat the forbidden foods an then begin anew. Things I will have to adjust to: black coffee, no dairy, no grains, and I like beans but no beans OR CORN...WHY NO CORN? haha

TODAY is the day I started weighing in. Every morning and evening this month I'm tracking my weight. After this month I'll be doing it once a week. I want to get a baseline for my fluctuations. I'm not frustrated by the number on the scale. I accept it. It can only get better from here. 

I spent New Year's Eve de-hoarding my apartment. I got my bathroom and office done on NYE and my living room and kitchen done the day after New Year's. Still working on the bedroom and finishing touches in the living room. I've got tons of trashbags ready to go out with stuff I no longer need and some donation bags at the ready too. My apartment feels cleaner and ready for 2017. Bye bye baggage. 

Well, that's all I got today. Happy 2017 everyone!

Until next time....

2016: A Year in Review

As 2015 came to a close, I began to make my vow for 2016. Instead of resolutions, I dedicate the year to something. In 2014...I vowed I would move to South Philly, adopt a Boxer dog, get a journalism job and buy a Kia Soul for 2015. I did all of those things. For 2016, things were a bit more generic. I dedicated the year to health. I wanted to focus on my mental, emotional and physical health throughout 2016. 

To start the year off right, I attended a wellness yoga workshop on New Year's Eve. That was how I wanted to set my intention for the year ahead. Wellness. Health. Life. 

I'd say this has been a very interesting year. Did I lose 30lbs? No, actually I gained and am seeing doctors about that. I did however run the most races I have ever ran in my life. I finished 2016 with four 5Ks, one 5 miler, two 10ks, one 10 miler, and a half marathon under my belt. I kickboxed, got to do yoga on the Phillies outfield, and did training runs on the Ben Franklin Bridge. Let's take a look at 2016. 

January
I started off 2016 with a cold. I was so ready to kick 2016's ass and be super healthy. I was knocked out with a cold for about two weeks before I could really get started working on my goals. As January came to a close we got hit with a massive snow storm. 

Bronx had to wear booties! 

It was a lot of snow in a very short amount of time. Also during this time, work was kind of insane. Our department was undergoing a lot of transition at once and I was just trying to keep up with all of the changes. 

February

In February, Bronx turned 3! We also celebrated our one year adoption anniversary! The weather was great and I started to run again. I participated in a Valentine's Day run in 14 degree temps! (Ok, so the weather wasn't that great). I was also involved in a few kickboxing challenges and was going religiously. I bought a waffle maker after tax time. also, on the 21st, I ran my first 5K without stopping to walk! That was a huge accomplishment.

My baby boy turned 3!

March

This year I had the opportunity to have a few visitors. My college friend and sophomore roomate Catherine came to visit me with her husband James. I also got to see my good friend Chrystal from high school AND my sorority little, Reba paid a visit as well. I was a hot spot on the friends tour. March brought about more running. I did two races this month. I also felt really accomplished at work. We underwent more transitions and I had to step up and take charge. I was thrown into the deep end of the pool and I surprised myself by being able to swim (metaphorically that is). I landed an important news story that highlighted some of the work we do. 

Kickboxing outing with the crew!

April

It was around this time where I started participating in bridge training runs on the Ben Franklin Bridge. I paid like $30 or something and got a Ben Franklin Bridge scotch glass and got to do these training runs with other area runners. I met a lot of friends though that series and it made me feel like a solid part of the Philly running community. I was typically one of the last runners to finish the bridge, but everyone was very supportive. Afterward we'd head over to Dave and Buster's for a free beer and raffle. I really enjoyed these runs. 

After one of the bridge runs 

At the conclusion of April, one of my high school best friends got married! I traveled down to the Eastern Shore of Virginia to be one of her bridesmaid's. Our whole hometown crew was there so it was a reunion of sorts. I felt really privileged to be able to be a part of her special day. 

Hometown besties for Heather's wedding

May

I thought I was ready. I thought I had trained enough for the Broad Street Run 10 Miler. I did not. It rained and poured the whole day. I slowly made my way through the 10 insufferable miles in the pouring rain. It was brutal. I hoped to PR, but I did not. I finished about 5 minutes slower than I did the year before. Ugh. I'm hoping 2017 will be a PR year for me. That was one health goal I set for myself but did not make it. I did finish though, as hard as it was. The night after the race I set my alarm for 11:55pm so I could be one of the first 600 registrants for the discounted rate for the 2016 Philadelphia Half Marathon. I loved RUN 215 and the Philly running community. I leaned on them for support leading up to Broad Street. I didn't want that connection to end so I set another goal: my first half. 

My survival photo after Broad Street Run (or swim really) 2016

June

The summer was hot and my running sort of fell to the side. I did other active things though. I spent a lot of time with my best friend, David. We did an evening event at the Philadelphia Magic Gardens. We did yoga on the Phillies outfield (amazing). 

We were all about the adventures. It was a hot summer, though. I just didn't have it in me to run in the heat. So running took a backseat for a little while. I spent quality time kickboxing or in my air conditioning with Bronx (who also can't stand the heat). I'd have to take water bottles with me on his walks because he would get thirsty so quickly. 

July

My favorite holiday (July 4th) came and went but it was splendid. Summer was in full swing for sure. David and I made it to the Jersey Shore twice which was really fun. I participated in a DNC donkey run (run around Philly taking photos with the DNC donkeys for each state/territory)

Donkey Run crew

The donkey run was a donkey walk due to heat. When you mention the run to those who did it, people joke and ask not to speak of it. (It was brutal). Fun though. 

August

August was jam packed with so much fun. It started off a little rough, I found myself in a bit of a funk. I was super stressed and just an emotional tornado. I bought a few books to help me get through the rough patch. I was feeling really alone at work because another person left our department and it was literally like survivor. I was the last man standing. But the middle to end of the month made up for that. I saw the Goo Goo Dolls and Collective Soul in concert (2nd row!). David and I did our annual tradition of Crabfest. I got to attend my friend's family reunion again. I celebrated my birthday on a Drink Philly boat cruise! 

Made some new friends on the cruise

I was slowly starting to take steps to take care of myself. I had become such a workaholic that I'd power through my days off doing work at home too. I started a bullet journal which helped keep me sane. It became a great tool to organize my life, write down memorable moments and keep track of my moods. I still use it today! 

I rounded out August with the Philly 10K. I winged this race and ended up paying for it. I don't know what happened, but after the race I got horrible edema in my right leg. This put me out of kickboxing for a little bit. My leg was so swollen!

Made it and then paid for it.....

September

September was looking to be a pretty uneventful month. I celebrated David's 30th birthday. I got a new and permanent boss (who I admire greatly). I fixed my toilet on my own. I was getting back on track with kickboxing again. (We never figured out what the edema was all about but it resolved). As September was wrapping up, my world was a bit shaken up. I was headed to work early for a big video project when I got in a car accident and totaled my 2012 Kia Soul. Sasha Fierce was no more. 

I was okay and the other guy was okay. No one was seriously injured but I had airbag burns on my arms. I was hoping my car would make it but the damage outweighed the cost of the car. I was going to need to buy a new car. I rented for almost a month before I had to purchase a new car....a task I really didn't want to do. 

October

Buying a new car is a terrifying process. I mean, it is exciting but it is also scary. I had to do it though. Instead of another used car I got a brand new 2016 Kia Soul. Designer package! Her name is Caribbean Katniss. Caribbean for the Caribbean blue color and Katniss because she couldn't be killed in the Hunger Games. I love it. I felt like such an adult in that thing as I drove it off the lot. 

The rest of October went smoothly. I was Becky with the Good Hair for Halloween. I got a jury summons exactly one year to the day from last year. 

November

Usually my years start off epic and peter out toward the end. 2016 was the opposite. Life continued to get better as the year went on. In November, I got to travel for work for the first time in a long time! Work sent me to Las Vegas! I had never been that far west before. My boss and I attended a great Healthcare Internet conference out in Vegas. I loved every single second of it. Vegas is the most non-judgmental place on earth. Seriously. Also I won $75 on slots at the casino! It was such a unique experience that I will never forget. 

Binion's Casio on Old Las Vegas

It was also in November when David and I went to The Fray concert. We were in the front row! Words can describe how perfect that concert was. Twice the lead singer from American Authors and The Fray came over to us and sang right in front of us. Issac from The Fray crowd surfed in our section! 

The Fray!!!

Wondrous November wasn't done with me yet. It was November when I attempted and somehow actually succeeded in completing the Philadelphia Half Marathon with ZERO training. I would never recommend winging a half marathon but I didn't want to lose my money and I thought I'd attempt to finish. There was a lot of walking....a lot. However, I finished and got my medal and wrote a hilarious article about the whole ordeal. A fellow runner read my article, messaged me on Facebook and we're now friends. We just hung out the other day! So, the power of writing can bring people together. (That and really well written self-deprecation). If I ever attempt a half marathon again, I'll be sure to actually train for it. 

It was a miracle I survived. I was so sore for a few days (and may have done something crazy to my back). What an accomplishment, though. 

I went home for Thanksgiving and got to spend some time with the hometown crew sans one. My parents and I got to practice shooting in the back yard. Bronx enjoyed the sweet smell of turkey. After Thanksgiving I left Bronx in Virginia for a bit.....

December

At the close of November, I had jury duty, was actually picked...reported to serve and was mercifully released because the case settled. However, I had another work trip coming up and I wanted to make sure Bronx wasn't left in a kennel. So I left him at Thanksgiving for what would be 22 days. 22 days without my fur child!!! He was having the vacation of a lifetime but I really missed him. 

My next work adventure took me to Scottsdale, Arizona. Again, another taste of the west for me. I loved it. My conference was a day-long residency program for social media in healthcare. I didn't want the learning to end! I met some really fantastic people. I also got to go one some epic hikes. After my conference, I spent some time in Sedona, Arizona and even got to take a tour of the Grand Canyon!!!!

I did three hikes in one day in Sedona....

I never thought I'd be in a position where I was encouraged to travel for professional development. I have plenty of friends that get to travel for business all the time. This was the first time that opportunity was really offered to me. I had so much accrued vacation time from working my butt off as the solo jack of all trades that I was able to take a few days for myself to really explore Arizona on my own. I learned a lot about myself, especially that traveling gives me a different level of happiness. I also learned than when you are female and travel alone, people applaud you for it. Everyone kept telling me how great it was that I was exploring on my own. I guess I took it for granted. I'm very independent so it felt like any other adventure for me but people appreciate having guts I guess. Yay guts! 

There are not enough adjectives out there to describe the Grand Canyon. 

Seriously. I also happened to have the best tour group ever. It was three of us and our guide. What started out as a tour with strangers ended up a road trip with friends. The memories and experiences I got to have while out there will last a lifetime. Not to be cheesy but it is true. 

December is still going strong as I write this, but Christmas is this weekend and then we're greeting 2017. I've spent the past few days doing traditional Christmas things in Philly including the Macy's Light show, Comcast holiday show, South Philly Lights Run (ok, I drove the route because it was cold but I did with with my new running friend who read my article about my half marathon and reached out). I made a point to really get ready for Christmas. Like, stare Christmas in the face and say bring it! I feel so prepared and full of Christmas spirit! Shopping is done, apartment has been decorated all month. I've been able to connect with some dear friends and spend time with them this season. I've been very happy and I feel somewhat balanced in life...for once. 

So what lies ahead?

Well...opportunity. My department is going through a rebuilding phase which will lead to a strong and robust team. I'm very excited to be a part of that. I now have a bunch of races I want to do again. (See you in May BSR). I'm working on some new friendships and strengthening some old ones. 

Since I dedicated 2016 to health, I'm dedicating 2017 to love. Love of all kinds...romantic, friendship and love for myself. I think it is going to be a great year. As of right now, it looks like I'm ringing in the new year with the purge. Not a bad purge, but a purge of my apartment. I want to go through all of my belongings and donate stuff....lighten the load for 2017. Start the year off clutter free. That's the plan unless another activity presents itself. 

2016, you've been cray....but you've also been pretty great. Every year has been great since I started ringing in the New Year as the best version of myself. That is a tradition that I'm going to keep doing. 

Until next time....